Special Something
by DeterminedX2
Summary: COMPLETE. After Squidward uses his ink on him, an underwear clad SpongeBob ventures to find his own special something ...
1. SpongeBob and Squidward Friendship Day!

**Special Something**

**Chapter 1**

HOOOOOONK……

SpongeBob's eyes flung open. He reached over to turn off his alarm, grinning ear to ear.

"Oh, boy!" he happily exclaimed. "Gary, do you know what day it is?"

"Meow?" said Gary inquisitively.

"It's the anniversary of the day Squidward and I became neighbors! And you know what that means?"

"Meow?"

"Bahahahahaha!" he laughed. "No, I'm all out of cucumbers….. No, today Squidward and I are going to have a special fun day!" He giggled sheepishly. "But he doesn't know it yet! It's a surprise!"

"...…meow??"

SpongeBob stood up in his bed. "No time to get ready today, I'm too eager to get started!" With that, SpongeBob jumped from his bed through his window. He fell onto the ground outside, along with the window's shattered glass.

In Squidward's house, Squidward was in bed sleeping. SpongeBob approached, stifling his giggles.

"SURPRISE!" he screamed.

Squidward jolted awake. "Huh?!" He turned to see the little sea sponge. "SPONGEBOB! What in Neptune's great ocean are you doing in my bedroom?!"

"Just making sure you don't sleep in and miss out on…." He smiled widely, "OUR SPECIAL FUN DAY!"

Squidward glanced at the clock. "It's 3:03 in the morning!" he shouted angrily.

"Yeah, sorry I'm three minutes late…...you know Gary, that chatty Cathy—"

Squidward pointed an accusing tentacle at SpongeBob. "And why aren't you wearing pants?!"

"I didn't have time to get dressed— I was too excited to get over here and start our special day!"

He threw his arms up in frustration. "Why would I want to spend my day off with you?!"

"Don't you know what day it is, Squidward? It's the anniversary of the day you and I became neighbors!" SpongeBob jumped onto the bed. "We're gonna have so much fun!"

Squidward, unnerved by SpongeBob's presence in his bed, backed up and sat on his pillow. "Get OFF my bed, SpongeB—"

"I'm going to call today…. SpongeBob and Squidward Friendship Day! SASFD for short, respectively."

"You and I are NOT friends…." said Squidward. "…...we're neighbors…... Our relationship is purely geographical!"

"Oh, silly Squidward!" he said with a little wave.

"I am serious, SpongeBob!"

SpongeBob reached into his underwear. "The first thing we should do on our special day is have breakfast together." He pulled out a plate of buttered waffles and smiled a dopey grin.

Squidward's eye twitched. "You have three seconds to get out of my house," he said, gritting his teeth with anger. "One...…..two…..."

"Hold on," said an oblivious SpongeBob, digging further into his underpants. "I have some syrup in here somewhere…..."

"…THREE." Squidward stood up on the bed, his body shaking with rage. "That is IT, SpongeBob! I am going to do something to you I should have done a long time ago!"

"Umm…...Squid? I—"

Before the sea sponge could finish his sentence, his face was covered with a black liquid. He opened his eyes and blinked. He held out his arms, dripping with the fluid, and looked up to Squidward. His lip quivered and his eyes welled with tears. "You….. you…... pooped on me?!" SpongeBob hopped off the bed and began to run wildly around the room, sobbing and screaming. "Gross! Gross! Gross! Eew! Eew! Eew!"

"That's not poop you idiot!" shouted Squidward. "It's ink!"

SpongeBob slid to a stop. "Ink??"

"Yes, ink," said Squidward. "You and your pants-less self made me do it!"

SpongeBob brought his finger to his chin. "Hmmm…." Then he clenched his muscles as hard as he could, gritted his teeth, and balled his hands into fists. His body trembled and a squeak was heard.

"What are you doing?!" asked an increasingly infuriated Squidward.

"Trying to make ink too!" replied the sponge cheerfully. "But it's not working…. maybe if I clench even harder…."

"No, stop!" Squidward grabbed him but then quickly dropped him again. "You can't make ink. Only people like me can, NOT SPONGES."

"But why?"

"That's just the way nature is." He crossed his arms. "It's our special defense."

"What about sponges? What are our special… something?"

"How should I know?! I mean……. why don't you try to go figure it out? Away from here?"

"But what about SASFD?"

"The what? Oh, I mean…. finding out could be your gift to me. Yeah." Squidward tried to push SpongeBob toward the door but he didn't move.

SpongeBob saluted. "Okay, Squidward! I will do just that!" He reached back into his pants and pulled out the same waffles from before. "Right after we enjoy these! I knew you wouldn't forget," he said with a wink.

"Oh, uh, say…." began Squidward. "You know the BEST way to enjoy waffles?"

"WITH BLUEBERRIES?!"

"Noooo…... get up on the window sill and I'll show you."

"Okee dokee, Squidward!" He leapt up onto the open, circular sill, waffles in hand. "Hey this feels really familiar!"

"I'm sure it does." Squidward reached for the hinged windowpane and slammed it shut.

SpongeBob was pushed from the ledge and slammed into the ground. He sat up, pealed the buttery waffles from his face, and unlodged the fork from his body.

"Squidward is right!" he said triumphantly. "I should find my special something! Shouldn't be too hard, lots of people have called me 'special'." He struck a pose. "Yeeeah!"

And with that, his search began…...

To be continued...

_Reviews are very much appreciated:)_


	2. Cleanliness is next to something

**Special Something: Chapter 2**

IN THE PINEAPPLE…..

SpongeBob paced back and forth in his kitchen. "Think, SpongeBob, think! What is special about me?" he asked himself.

Gary slithered into the kitchen.

"Gary!" SpongeBob grabbed him as he slid past. "I'm trying to think of my special something. Maybe you can help me out! What do you think of when you think of me?"

"Meow."

He dropped Gary to the floor. "Darn it Gary, I already fed you!"

"Meow."

SpongeBob thought for a moment. "I see your point." He nodded. "But I meant, what do you think of when you think of SPONGES?"

Gary began to hack.

SpongeBob crossed his arms. "Very funny," he said sarcastically.

The snail continued to cough and gasp for air.

"I get your point already!"

The hacking sounds became even louder—Gary couldn't stop.

"Oh-my-gosh! You're coughing up a slime-ball, aren't you?" After briefly running around in a couple of panicked circles, SpongeBob picked up Gary and ran towards the laid out newspaper in the corner. "Just hold on Gary, you can make it, we're almost to the news—"

SpongeBob looked down to see the wet, dripping slime-ball fall to the floor just inches away from the newspaper.

He sighed and put Gary back down. "Guess I better clean this up." But he only took two steps toward his cleaning supplies before a realization stopped him in his tracks. He gasped with excitement. "Gary! I just thought of my special something!"

"Meow??"

"I'll refill your water dish later—can't you see I'm having an epiphany!"

"Meow……..."

"I'm a sponge, right? Well, what do people use sponges for?"

"Meow."

"Well, I was thinking of cleaning sponges, though I guess you're right too." Then he smiled widely. "Sponges were made for cleaning! I'm going to use my special ability to do good!"

With that, he ran out the door. His silhouette became smaller and smaller as he walked toward the still dark horizon. "I'm off to fulfill my spongey destiny, Gary! Don't chew on the house plants while I'm gone!"

Gary glanced over to the slime-ball beside him, which SpongeBob hadn't clean up. "Meow?"

* * *

SpongeBob approached the Krusty Krab. "Where better to begin than my second favorite place in all the deep blue sea?" He stopped and hugged the frame of the restaurant. "Mr. Krabs will be so proud of me when he sees the Krusty Krab cleaned top to bottom!"

He looked up at the glass door. "Hmmm. I don't have a key. Guess I'll just have to find my own way in!" he said with a shrug. SpongeBob karate-kicked the door and shattered it to pieces. For the second time that day, he picked glass shards out of himself. "Oh, boy!" he exclaimed giddily. "Here's something to clean up! I knew this was my special something…. maybe it's my lacerations from the glass talking, but I'm getting a tingly feeling inside! Could it be?" His eyes were starry. "I've found my calling!"

For the next few hours, SpongeBob mopped, wiped, scrubbed, swept, dusted, washed, and de-Krustied nearly everything in the restaurant, even the Krabby Patties.

SpongeBob stepped back and admired his hard work. The place glimmered around him as he stood, beaming with pride. "It's beautiful! I just love sparkles!" He frowned. "But I feel like I forgot something…." His eyes wandered around, each looking in different directions, for anything not sparkling. His left eye froze, fixated upwards. "The crow's nest, of course! How could I forget Mr. Krab's favorite place to spy on people?"

After realigning his eyes, he shimmied up the pole. He whipped out the washcloth he'd been using all night, but a foghorn sound and arising stink-waves let him know that it was too dirty now to be used. "No matter!" said SpongeBob, waving it off. "I've got plenty of cleaning supplies!" He pulled out a pink sponge and began to scrub.

As he scrubbed, a strange sensation came over him. "What is this I'm feeling now?" he asked himself. "Oh, no, it's….. the bitter sting of IRONY!" He doubled over in pain. "I'm scrubbing with a SPONGE!"

SpongeBob rolled around madly, beginning to cry. He jumped out of the crow's nest and landed with a thud. His tears sprayed in all different directions as he bawled loudly. "It's..… just..…too...…much…...irony!"

It was almost opening time, and Mr. Krabs was approaching the Krusty Krab. "Ooh, I can't wait to caress that fiver in the back of the cash register," he said to himself, making his way up the sidewalk. He stopped at the entrance. "Hmm. I remember having a door here."

Just then, the sounds of SpongeBob's dejected wails caught his attention. He rushed in to see him rolling in a puddle of tears. "SpongeBob! What in the name of Davy Jones' locker are you doing here…. without any pants?!"

"Crying!" he sobbed.

"Well, stop it! Customers are gonna be comin' in here soon! Now suck it up, put your little square pants on, and get to the grill!" he ordered, pointing a claw to the kitchen.

SpongeBob was lying on his back. "I can't, Mr. Krabs."

The crab sighed. "Aye…... what's wrong, lad?"

"I…...I…..." He sniffled. "I was trying to find my special something because Squidward told me to because it's SpongeBob and Squidward Friendship Day and I came over to his house this morning but he said find this out and I talked to Gary and I realized I'm a sponge and sponges are for cleaning so I thought that was my special something so I cleaned the Krusty Krab but then I realized I used a sponge to do it I didn't even use myself so didn't count and now I still don't know what my special something is!"

"Whoa, boy! Talk about a run-on sentence!" Mr. Krabs pulled SpongeBob up from the floor. "Is that all you're crying about? Something that doesn't even make sense?"

"That's not all, Mr. Krabs." He quivered. "I also felt the burning sting of irony!"

"Ouch….. I remember the first time I felt the sting of irony. It was at this seafood restaurant and…. nevermind, I don't wanna talk about it."

"What should I do, Mr. Krabs?"

"If you wanna find your special something, you gotta reach deep inside yourself."

SpongeBob inserted his hand into one of his holes and pulled out his pancreas. "Like this?"

Mr. Krabs frowned. "Uh…."

"Or this?" he pulled out one of his kidneys.

"No—"

"Or this?" He looked at the organ and blinked. "I don't even know what this one is!" he said, and tossed it aside.

"Stop!"

"Or how about this?" He reached in and pulled out his intestine. But the more he pulled, the more came. He continued pulling it out like it was that old gag with the tied handkerchiefs. "Ooh, it just keeps coming!"

Just then, the first couple customers walked in. "I'll have a Krabby Pat—" a fish began to announce, but he stopped when he saw a pants-less sea sponge pulling out his intestine with a crab, standing in a puddle of tears and now a bit of blood.

"What's the matter, dear?" asked a fish from behind. Then she suddenly slipped on SpongeBob's previously tossed organ. "Ohh….." she groaned, holding her head.

"SpongeBob! Get out of here before you scare away all me customers!" barked Mr. Krabs.

"But, sir, what about my special something?"

"Oh, you're gonna get a special something alright…" he said, shaking with anger.

"Okay, okay, I'm leaving!" SpongeBob hurried for the door, afraid his boss was going to explode.

* * *

He rushed down the street. "Now what do I do?" He grinned. "I know! I'll ask the smartest person I know!"

SpongeBob turned around and happily marched toward the treedome. "I'm ready! I'm ready!" He stumbled dizzily for a moment. "... organs hurting! Still ready!"

* * *

_I have to stop here because it's... REVIEW TIME!! Yep, so review away._

_...please?_


	3. Morphology with Sandy

**Special Something: Chapter 3**

SpongeBob somersaulted down the street like a wheel, zipping past pedestrians. He looked like a yellow blur of a ball careening toward the treedome. He rolled right up and knocked down both doors, a bit of water gushing through the second before it slammed behind him.

To dismount his speeding roll, he leapt into the air, twirled three times, and fell flat on his face, where he resumed his sobbing. "SAAAAAAAANDY!"

The squirrel hurried over. "SpongeBob! What in the name of hickory smoked chitterlin's are you doing here?"

He rolled over and gasped for air. "I...….neeeeeed…...…"

"I know what you need! Gimme a sec!" She ran away and returned in a flash to stuff a water helmet on his head. "There ya go, little buddy! Right as rain! Or should I say…."

"I don't have time for puns, Sandy!" he interrupted. "I am need of something else…..something SPECIAL!"

"Where are your pants, SpongeBob?"

"I need to figure out my special something, Sandy!" He grabbed her and pulled her close, his eyes bugging out. "Can you help me?!"

"…...uhhhh…... does this have anything to do with you being in your underwear? Because—"

"Shhh." He pointed to himself. "Listen to me! When I woke up Squidward this morning, he sprayed me with ink….. and now, I'm trying to find my own special something." His eyes teared up again. "But I can't!"

She blinked, confused.

He fell to his knees. "Sandy, you're the smartest person I know. You've just got to help me!" he pleaded.

"Cool your jets, SpongeBob. I think I'm beginning to understand. Just give me a moment to think…..." She brought her hand to her chin and thought hard.

"Oh my gosh, it's been three moments already! Hurry up!"

"Don't be rushin' me!" Her face brightened. "I've got it!"

SpongeBob cart-wheeled around Sandy, beaming. "Yaaaaaaaay!" Somehow the background behind him was briefly a rainbow of bright colors.

"Your flesh is made of spicules consisting of the protein spongin. So...…."

His pupils were dilated with anticipation. "Yeah…...?!"

"So think about it." Sandy picked him up and gave him a squeeze. His body let out a squeak and he giggled. "You're soft!" She stretched him out her entire arm span. "This allows your body to change shape!"

After a quick, gracious hug and another squeak, SpongeBob jumped to the ground. With an ecstatic grin on his face, he began to sing: "I'm soft! I'm soft!" He pranced about, spinning and clapping. "I can—"

"Okay SpongeBob, that's enough singing."

"You can never have enough singing!" His face darkened. "EVER."

"Weren't you listening to me, SpongeBob? I told you, you're a shape shifter! That's your special something!"

"WOW!"

"Go ahead, give it a try!"

"Okay!" SpongeBob became hard, his sides rigid. "Ta-dah! I'm a rectangle!"

She stared back. "Um…... why not try something a little more difficult?"

"Okee dokee." His whole body tightened as he concentrated. Then his lower half rode up to shorten himself. "Now I'm a square!"

Sandy rubbed her temple. "I don't think you understand. You can change SHAPE. You've done it lots of times! Don't you remember?"

"Oh, yeah! Like when I became a basketball at the prom! Or a surfboard at the beach! Or some letter in an episode I forgot!"

"Yeah! Do it like that!"

SpongeBob changed his body into an exclamation point in excitement.

"You did it!" she exclaimed. "Now do another!"

He switched to a nut shape. "Bahahahaha! I'm nuts! Get it?"

Sandy laughed. "Y'all are too funny, SpongeBob!"

SpongeBob started to stretch himself long, but he fell over after about two feet with a shriek.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't do this anymore!" He snapped back to normal size. "I just remembered something my parents once told me: Never try anything besides easy things for short amount of time!"

She frowned. "Why not?"

"Because I could get stuck like that! I was going to do a tree, but there's no way I'm trying that…. I don't want to be a sponge tree for the rest of my life!"

Sandy gave a wave. "Oh, phooey! That sounds like a bucket of road apples. All you need is a little training."

"I don't know, Sandy…..."

"You're already warmed from the simple shapes you did. Now let's try…...um…..." she glanced around and saw her picnic table. "Oooh, do that!" she said, pointing to it.

"That's way too hard. I'll get stuck!"

"That's no way to think. Come on now, you can do it!"

"I'm afraid!"

Her temper flared. "I SAID DO IT!!"

"Yes, ma'am!" he said meekly with a salute. SpongeBob took a deep breath, and stretched himself. His body perfectly assumed the shape of a picnic table, his underwear being the tablecloth.

"I'm impressed, SpongeBob," said Sandy, hands on her hips.

He quivered. "Okay, can I go back to SpongeBob shape now? That's my favorite shape."

"Not yet. I want you to hold it for at least fifteen more seconds."

"Sandy!" His tabley body trembled. "I'm scared!"

"Just thirteen more seconds."

"Can you at least tell me a joke or something to pass the time?"

"Um, okay. Let's see…... what did one olive say to the other olives before they went on a mission to find a clean, replenishable alternative to fossil fuels?"

"I dunno, what?"

"OLIVE us can go!" She doubled over laughing. "Ha ha ha! Isn't that a hoot, SpongeBob?"

"No that joke was awful, is my time up yet?"

"Yup!"

"Phew." SpongeBob tried to snap back to his normal shape, but as I'm sure the readers predicted, he was not able to. "Sandy, I'm stuck!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! Why did I listen to you? I knew this would happen!" He started to cry again.

"Don't cry, SpongeBob!" she said, taking a seat on SpongeBob. "This ain't a big deal. I'm sure I can fix this lickety split."

SpongeBob couldn't hear her; his uncontrollable sobs drowned out her voice.

"That's it, I'm going in!" She pulled open one of his holes wide and dived in.

SpongeBob gasped. "Sandy?! What are you doing?!"

"I'm fixing the problem from the inside!" said her muffled voice. "Leaping lizard tails! Your organs are not in right places! …...…and one of them is missing!"

"Which one?" he asked.

"Uh…... well, let's just say I don't think you've ever used it…… Hey!" she exclaimed. "I think I found what I'm looking for!"

_POP!_

SpongeBob deflated like a popped balloon. His skin fell loosely around Sandy's shape.

"Shee-oot!" said Sandy. "Sorry about that," she said as she stepped out of him as if he were an oversized bathrobe.

"It's okay," he said in a defeated voice, now being just a pile of skin, face, and underwear. "You were just trying to help." Sighing, a tear dripped down his face. "I guess shape shifting wasn't my special something."

Sandy was frowning but she quickly smiled to say: "You know what I think, SpongeBob? I think that this is something you need to figure on your own. Look deep inside yourself and I'm sure you'll find what you've been searching for."

"I tried that, but I only misplaced my organs."

"Oh. Well this time, instead taking the advice literally, take it more on a symbolic level."

"You're probably right…... but what do I do about being this?!" He pointed with his flat arms to his horribly misshapen body.

"Hmmm…..."

A few foldings, stitchings, cuttings, and other verbings later, Sandy had patched SpongeBob back together.

"I dunno…... you did a pretty shoddy job, Sandy," he said to her.

"It's okay, continuity doesn't exist in the sea," she replied, giving him a slap for insulting her.

"Goodbye, Sandy!" he chirped happily, heading for the door. "Next time you see me, I'll be SPECIAL!"

She watched him get smaller in the distance, shaking her head.

To be continued…...

* * *

_Credit to Wikipedia…. I had to look up what sea sponges were made of (spicules, spongin)_

_Sooooo... what'd ya think? Review and tell me about it._


	4. Not a fortune

Special Something: Chapter 4 

BACK IN THE PINEAPPLE…..

SpongeBob drew his curtains and dimmed the lights. He lit a few candles and some incense, and flopped on his bed.

He inhaled deeply. "I must figure this out. I must find myself."

Self discovery proved rather boring, and soon SpongeBob's eyes fluttered shut as he slipped into a peaceful slumber.

"Hey, SpongeBob!" said Patrick, popping up from the side of the bed.

There was no response from the sponge.

"SpongeBob? SpongeBob?! Oh, no! Don't worry, I'll save you, buddy!" Patrick clasped his nubs together and pounded SpongeBob's chest. "LIVE, darn it!"

"WAAAHH!!" he awoke with a fright.

Patrick geared up to strike him again, but SpongeBob interrupted.

"Patrick, STOP!" he said, flailing his arms in a panic.

"You're alive!" The starfish jumped for joy. "I am you SAVIOR!"

"Ugh," moaned SpongeBob, gripping his chest. "My heart hurts." He looked up. "What're you doing here, Patrick?"

His arms were behind his back. "Oh, I just came over to get your help with….." From behind his back, he quickly unveiled a large package. "…… eating this huge box of fortune cookies!"

"Wow! There must hundreds! Where did you get them?"

"I just found them laying around."

FLASHBACK…..20 MINUTES AGO AT PATRICK'S…..

A delivery fish on a bicycle approached Patrick, sitting outside his rock. "Excuse me, sir, did you order 143 chicken chow mein's?"

"Huh. I don't think so. I believe I ordered 143 chicken LO mein's."

"It says on the order, 'chow.'"

"THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT!!" he roared, the force of the scream physically blowing him away.

The man scrambled to his bike and peddled off. In his hurry, the box of fortune cookies flew off and fell beside Patrick.

Patrick stared into space for seven whole minutes before exclaiming in surprise, "Wow, an abandoned box!"

BACK IN THE PINEAPPLE AND PRESENT TIME……..

"That's great, Patrick! Let's eat'em!"

Patrick began shoveling them into his mouth, chomping loudly.

"Whoa, whoa! You've gotta read your fortune first!"

"Oh, yeah! Duh!" He reached inside himself and pulled out one of the tiny slips of paper. "Oh, no! My fortune is blank! I must have no future!"

"Bahahahaha! I think you're reading the wrong side."

"Oh yeah," he said, flipping it over. "'A clam in the hand is worth two in the kelp'……. what's that supposed to mean?! That's not a fortune!"

"Patrick, calm down, it's just for fun." Fishing a cookie out of the box, he cracked one open. "Here, I'll read one for me. Ahem. 'Real dreams never come true unless you wake up'." SpongeBob stared at the fortune, his face blank.

"Uh, SpongeBob….?"

"What's that supposed to mean?! That's not a fortune at all! It's mean… and, and, it doesn't make sense, and, and," he stammered as his eyes began to well with tears. "And it's not true! And….!"

"Calm down, SpongeBob. It's just for fun, remember?"

"That's easy for you to say! You're content with yourself! You know your special something…"

"Huh?"

"You know, sticking to things. With your back."

He stared with empty eyes at SpongeBob. "You lost me about 76 words back."

"But what about me?!" continued the SpongeBob dramatically, ignoring his friend. "I've been searching for…. hours! And I haven't figured it out!" He sighed. "I'll never know my special something….." Tears dripping down his cheeks, he crawled back into bed and pulled the covers over himself. "Just leave me be, Patrick. I don't want you to see me…. like _this_," he said, his voice breaking.

For a moment Patrick had empathy for the sponge, but then he was overcome with a determined flare. "Oh, no, you don't! SpongeBob Squarepants, you get yourself out of the bed this instant!" He jerked the blanket off of SpongeBob. "You are gonna figure this out, no matter what it takes!"

He sniffled. "I can't!"

"You can! Just THINK!"

"Maybe thinking comes easy to you Patrick, but I'm struggling with it."

"Very well, then. I will help you." Patrick clenched his teeth and furrowed his brow. Sweat beads dripped down his forehead and he heaved. Suddenly he exhaled and exclaimed, "I've got it!"

"What is it, Patrick?"

"Your HOLES!"

"………what?"

Patrick inserted a bottle of bubble soap into one of SpongeBob's holes.

SpongeBob shuttered. "COLD!….. what was that for, Patrick?" A bubbled escaped from one of his pores. "Huh?" SpongeBob inhaled and exhaled deeply, causing several bubbles to come out of his many holes. "Wow, I'm like a bubble machine!" he said, beaming.

"Yeah! Now you're special!"

Leaping out of bed, SpongeBob made his way down the stairway. On the way, he continuously blew bubbles with his body in all different directions. "Look out, world! Bubbly sponge coming through!"

"Go get'em, buddy!" said Patrick encouragingly, following him downstairs.

They stood at the door. "What are you gonna do now, SpongeBob?"

"I'm gonna show all of Bikini Bottom my special something!"

"Yay!"

SpongeBob marched proudly into the distance. "I'm ready! I'm special! I'm ready!"

Patrick watched him leave, smiling proudly. "There goes one brave sponge." He sighed, closed the door, and flopped in the chair. "…..wait. This isn't my house." Shrugging it off, he switched on the TV.

* * *

SpongeBob pranced along the street, passing by buildings and fellow pedestrians. He hummed as he expelled the bubbles in a stream behind him. He twirled on one foot and clenched his body, blowing out a mass of bubbles that carried him briefly upwards before they popped. He landed gracefully, spun a few more circles, and began to skip.

By now, he had attracted a small crowd of on-lookers. They whispered amongst themselves:

"What is that guy doing?"

"Why doesn't he have pants on?"

"Is today prance around in your underwear day?"

A mother fish shielded her son's eyes. "That sponge needs to put some clothes on!"

The people on the street snickered. As SpongeBob continued, the laughter grew louder.

One fish approached, trying to stifle his laughs. "Hey, buddy," he began sarcastically. "Lookin' good!"

"Thanks, fellow citizen!" replied SpongeBob cheerfully, and continued his bubbly gait. The fish burst out laughing only a few feet later. Looking over his shoulder, SpongeBob said, "Wow! My special something really brings joy to people! Everybody's laughing and smiling!"

Larry spotted SpongeBob and the ensuing hilarity. "Oh, boy," he muttered to himself as he made his way over.

"Make way, Larry!" said SpongeBob as the lobster blocked his path. "Special sponge coming through!"

"SpongeBob, what are you doing? Why don't you have any pants on?"

"It's okay, Larry," he replied, oblivious. "I understand you're jealous. Don't worry, you'll find your special something too someday. Then maybe you'll be as popular as me." Turning to the chuckling crowd behind him, he gave a wink.

"Popular? They're laughing at you."

"They're laughing with me."

Larry sighed. "Look around you, SpongeBob."

After quickly thinking it over, the sponge cautiously turned around once more. He looked carefully into the crowd, noticing their condescending laughs, sneering eyes, and how the word 'loser' was somehow formed in the sky by clouds despite the ocean setting.

The realization nearly choked SpongeBob. "No, no, no… this can't be happening!"

"Hey, moron!" shouted one fish. "This is an insult!"

"I guess it is!" SpongeBob sobbed. "Why, Neptune, why? Why do they mock my special something?" He gasped. "Unless…. this isn't my special something. Gosh, it makes so much sense! I can't use something else…. it must be 100 percent ME!"

"Uh, SpongeBob?" asked Larry. "Are you alright? You're laying on the ground talking to yourself."

With a bounce in his step, SpongeBob jumped up. "I'm more than alright, I'm determined!" He attempted to push Larry out of his way, but Larry didn't move. "Get out of my way again, Larry. I have more searching to do! I will prove to everyone who laughed at me that I'm not a loser, I'm SPECIAL!"

The lobster sighed and moved aside. He watched SpongeBob cartwheel off down the street, chanting, "I'm ready! Again! I'm ready!"

And thus another chapter concludes with SpongeBob leaving into distance, inspired.

To be continued…..

* * *

_It's that time again, boys and girls… review time! Don't you just love it? Don't forget! It only comes 'round once a chapter!_

_The number of views versus reviews is disproportionately uneven compared to my other fics. Come on, lurkers…. review. Live a little ;)_


	5. The SHUN Song

**Special Something: Chapter 5**

SpongeBob walked down the street, thinking about anything and everything at once except cleaning, changing shape, and his bubbly holes. Approaching the Krusty Krab, he averted his gaze— he wondered if Mr. Krabs may still be mad at him for earlier.

However, a little green piece of trash caught his eye. He quickly realized that the green piece of trash was actually Plankton, just outside the Krusty Krab.

"Plankton!" said SpongeBob, approaching the zooplankter. "What are you doing here, you little hamburglar?"

Plankton turned around quickly, tossing aside some papers and a protractor. "Huh? Oh, I was just… hanging around. I wasn't taking some measurements of the Krusty Krab for upcoming plans or anything."

"Oh."

"Saaaay," he began, trying to change the subject. "You look a little long in the face. What's wrong?"

"_Uh!_" he grunted in disgust. "I don't insult _your _looks!"

"No, no, I mean you look sad."

"Oh…. well I suppose I am. I've been trying to figure out my special something all day. Squidward can squirt ink, but what can I do? I've tried so many things—well, three—and all have been terrible failures."

"Hmm. Maybe you're going about it the wrong way. Take me first instance—I'm a genius. I guess you could call that my special something."

"If you're so smart, how come after years and years, you still haven't gotten the Krabby Patty secret formula? Or made one yourself? Or learned to cook something else? Or come up with your own idea to draw in customers? Or—"

"Okay, I get it!" Plankton interrupted angrily. "Do you want my help or not?"

"Wow, really!" SpongeBob's face brightened.

"Sure. I'll even overlook the fact that you're not wearing any pants for some reason."

"That's great!" He deadpanned. "Wait. Why should I trust you? After all those times you've tricked and betrayed me?"

Plankton scoffed. "Pfff. Like when?"

"Like…. remember, when we sang The FUN Song, and you stole the Krabby Patty, and broke my heart?"

"Uhh…. well, I can explain."

"Am I going to have to sing The SHUN Song?"

"What's that?"

It wasn't clear how, but somehow music began in the tune of "The FUN Song."

"S is for shame that you have brought me, H is for humil-i-aaaation! U is for an utter and complete a—"

"Stop!" he shouted. "It won't be like that again."

"Promise me," he said leaning down closer to him. "Swear it!"

Plankton sighed and rolled his eyes. "I swear to Neptune I will not betray you this time. Satisfied?"

"Quite satiated," he replied cheerfully.

"Okay, then. The first thing you must do to find your special something is pick me up."

SpongeBob bent down and cuffed Plankton in his hands. "Now what?"

"Now we must go inside the Krusty Krab."

SpongeBob glanced inside. The restaurant was dark and empty. He pulled at the door but it was locked. Nearly dropping Plankton, he jumped in shock. "Oh-my-gosh!……... Mr. Krabs got a new door!"

"Nevermind that, just go in."

"I don't understand," he said. "Why are we closed? We were open earlier…."

AT SPONGEBOB'S HOUSE….

Gary slithered up to the ringing shell phone. With no answer, there was a beep and a message:

"H-hey, SpongeBob," said a nervous crab. "It's good ol' Mr. Krabs. Sorry about kicking you out earlier...and the threatening... just come back…. please?! I can't handle all these customers by me-self! I can't believe I gave that no good Squidward the day off, I oughtta fire him—oh, well, hey, just come back, okay? Please, lad? Oh, no, more customers are leaving as I speak! Nooo, come back! Money…. walking….out…the door…. urrrgghhhh….keeechhhhh….waaaaaoooo……" _BEEP!_

Gary slithered away.

* * *

"Quit stalling, and let's go!" commanded Plankton.

Shrugging, SpongeBob karated-kicked the door down for the second time that day. "HI-YA!"

"Is that sound necessary?"

They walked inside and flipped on the lights. Plankton instructed him to go into the kitchen and the sponge obeyed.

Plankton now sat on SpongeBob's head. "So, tell me, what do you have the urge to do right now?"

Glancing around the room, he said instinctively, "Make a Krabby Patty."

"That's right! And you know why?"

He quivered with excitement. "I can tell you! I have a speech! Hold on, let me get my notecards…" He patted his underwear.

"It's because it's your special something," he said, ignoring his last comments.

He gasped. "It's so obvious! Why didn't I think of that?"

"Might have something to do with all the holes in your head…." Plankton muttered under his breath.

"What was that? Something about poles in my bread?"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just do it."

"Do what?"

"Make a Krabby Patty!"

"I can't, we're closed. The grill's not even hot yet, and—"

"Then warm it up!"

SpongeBob cautiously obeyed, turning the knob on the grill to the appropriate temperature.

"Now get everything out! The buns, the patty, the lettuce, the tomato, ALL OF IT!"

"But Plankton—"

"I said DO IT!"

It was a rare sight that SpongeBob prepared a Krabby Patty with a frown. But with Plankton barking orders in his ear, he couldn't help but feel rushed and uneasy.

The patty sizzled as SpongeBob flipped it over. Tears gathered in his eyes but he wouldn't allow himself to cry.

Plankton sat atop the sponge, grinning maniacally. "Yes, yes!" he cackled, then hushed his voice: "Soon you tasty little Krabby Patty, you will be mine…."

"S is for shame….that… you have brought… me….." he sang slowly, sniffling. "H is for…."

"Stop singing that dreadful song!" He threw his nubby arms up in frustration. "And quit crying, you'll get tears on the patty!"

"I'm not cr-cr-CRYING!" SpongeBob suddenly broke into a tearful fit. He bawled loudly, covering his face in his hands. He shook violently as he sobbed, tears spraying out of his eyes like water from a garden hose.

Plankton bounced on SpongeBob's head. "Hey, quit moving around!" he shouted. Reaching in vain for something to hold onto, he flailed around helplessly. Suddenly he flew off and onto the grill.

"AAAAAAHHHHH!!" he screamed in pain as he sizzled. Smoke rose from his frying body.

SpongeBob ceased his crying and gasped. "Don't worry, I'll save you!" He attempted to scrape him off with his spatula, but Plankton's flesh was already seared into the metal. "You're stuck!"

Suddenly Plankton caught on fire. "AAAUGHH!! IT BURNS!!"

SpongeBob pulled out a fire extinguisher and drenched the entire kitchen in the foam. For a moment only their eyeballs were visible.

SpongeBob blinked. "You okay?"

There was no answer.

Pushing the foam aside, SpongeBob found the little copepod, who had been reduced to a black, steaming clump. "Oh, no! You look like a crusty jellybean! Hmmm…. I know what to do!"

Cupping Plankton's limp body in his hands, he ran out the Krusty Krab door… er, hole... and across the street. He left him outside the Chum Bucket door, rang the doorbell, and jetted.

Plankton's computer wife Karen answered, on her mobile wheels. She glanced down at her smoking crisp of a husband on the ground. "Not again…." she said as she rolled her eyes.

As SpongeBob ran into the distant horizon, something about it caught his attention. "The sky is orange?! Oh no, THE SKY IS ON FIRE!!…. wait, no, the sun's just setting. Oh, no, THE SUN IS SETTING!!" He gripped his head in a panic. "SpongeBob and Squidward Friendship Day is almost over and I've hardly spent any time at all with Squidward!" Taking a deep breath, he continued walking. "I'll just have to explain to him I couldn't find my special something….. h-he'll understand…after all it's SASFD, respectively..."

* * *

_Just a heads up, the next chapter is likely the last._

_Review please…. don't make me have to sing The SHUN Song…. :P_


	6. Of rainbows and resolutions

**Special Something: Chapter 6**

Mrs. Puff rounded a curve in her boatmobile. The streetlights flicked on as the sun finally set off in the horizon. She hummed along to the radio, tapping her fin on the steering wheel in rhythm with the music. Today had been a good day for the pufferfish, as she had been spared the presence of her least favorite pupil.

But her luck was about to run out as her headlights shone on him, slouching in the street with a frown so big it nearly touched the ground. The sight of him, in his underwear, greatly startled her and with a scream she swerved. Her boatmobile crashed into the powerline, knocking it over and sending sparks in all directions.

SpongeBob gasped. "Mrs. Puff!" He ran over and looked inside the vehicle.

"Ohhh…." she groaned. The airbag deployed in her face.

"Oh, no! Are you okay?! How many fingers am I holding up?" He held up a fist. "I'll give you a hint, it's a trick question!"

As the airbag deflated, she gasped for breath. "SpongeBob?! What were you doing in the middle of the street, without any pants?!"

"Moping."

"Look at my boatmobile! It's totaled!"

"Well, look on the bright side. At least no one was hurt."

"I don't know…." she said, gripping her middle. "I'm kinda sore."

"That's just the bitter sting of irony. You know, because it was_ you_ who crashed instead of _me_."

"SpongeBob…." Her voice began to quiver with rage.

"Heeeey," he said, oblivious. "Maybe _you_ can help me find my special something!"

"Sponge…. Bob….." She gritted her teeth.

He was beginning to notice her anger. "Um…. you don't… by chance… umm…."

Suddenly, she puffed up, doubling her size. "SPONGEBOB!!" she roared in her deep voice.

"Okay, well, I'll see you at boating school then!" he replied hastily before rushing away.

SpongeBob walked quickly, a few nervous sweatdrops escaping. Shortly he was out of Mrs. Puff's headlights' beams and found himself in complete darkness. "Where…. where am I?" he wondered out loud. "Why is it so dark?"

When Mrs. Puff had struck the powerline, she'd knocked out all the power for miles. The streetlights were thus off, and SpongeBob couldn't see his hand in front of his face.

He felt for the ground and sat down. "I can't believe it… I couldn't find my special something… I'm going to disappoint Squidward… and now, I'm lost in the dark. Maybe I should just give up hope..." He hung his head in shame.

"Never give up hope, SpongeBob."

"Huh…?" he perked up. "Who said that?"

"It is I."

SpongeBob looked to his shoulder, where a tiny version of himself hovered. It wore a white robe, a halo, and had tiny wings jutting from its back. "Wow!"

"You cannot just abandon your dreams, SpongeBob."

"But… I just can't figure it out. I'll never find my special something."

"Oh, SpongeBob, don't you see? You can't find your special something, because _you are_ a special something."

His eyes grew wide and sparkled. "Really?"

Suddenly the tiny angel SpongeBob transformed in a puff of smoke. It now had a red outfit, devil horns, a pitchfork, and a tail with a little triangle at the end. "Nah, just kiddin'."

"Hey!" he exclaimed angrily.

"Ha HA! You really fell for it." The little devil-ish SpongeBob stretched and yawned. "Man, does it feel good to be out….. wait. I'm out? Holy carp, I'm out! Haha, haha!" he cackled. "I'm free! I'm FREE!"

"Umm…."

"You know how long it's been since I've had a chance to do _anything_? Talk about a raw deal, I get stuck with Mr. Goody-two-shoes here. I never get to have any fun!"

SpongeBob just sat there, his eyes wide.

"But now that I'm out—not to mention pants-less in the dark—I finally have a chance to be naughty!"

"I liked it better when you were the other guy."

"Oh, please. You mean this one?" It transformed back into the angel-form. "Oh, look at me! I like frilly things!" he said mockingly.

"Yeah. I like that better."

"Pffft. He'd probably say something like 'You can get out of this, all you need is to believe!'"

"Stop it!" SpongeBob balled his fists. "Don't make fun of stuff like that!"

"'Just use your imagination!'" he continued before doubling over with an evil laugh.

"That's not very nice! And besides, it's pronounced, 'imaginaaaaation.'" As SpongeBob said the last word, he took his clasped hands and pulled them away from each other, forming a rainbow. Think of the episode "The Idiot Box."

"Oh, whatever."

"Hey, that's a great idea! In fact, I'm going to _imagine_ you away!" With the word, 'imagine' SpongeBob did his hand motion again, and the creature disappeared from his shoulder. It was at that moment that he realized that a light had switched on in his brain. Almost literally.

"Hey! Every time I do that, I produce light! I can use the rainbow's glow to find my way to Squidward's in the dark!"

So SpongeBob used his imagination to guide the way. The only problem was that the rainbow only lasted a few seconds, so he was constantly forming another. But he didn't mind; he skipped happily down the street, illuminated by the repeated rainbows, singing, "Rudolph" but replacing the lines about reindeer and a nose to a sea sponge and rainbows.

It goes without saying that an underwear-clad sponge making rainbows in the dark while skipping down the street didn't attract a few stares and whispers, but that is a different story completely.

As he passed his pineapple home, he saw the lights turn on. "Hey, the power's back!" he said cheerfully. "What coincidental timing!"

SpongeBob continued to his neighbor's house, grinning ear to ear.

* * *

Squidward sighed contently. "A whole day off and SpongeBob only ruined the very beginning. Must be my lucky day."

Combining two of his favorite pastimes, he was painting a portrait of his clarinet in a bowl of fruit. He poked his tongue out, closed one eye, and held up a thumb to the bowl. He turned to the easel, and continued painting.

"Heya, Squidward!" said SpongeBob, popping out of seemingly nowhere.

"AAAHH!!" screamed Squidward, the startle forcing him to pierce the painting with the brush. He pulled it out and looked at the hole in his artwork. "My masterpiece, it's ruined!"

SpongeBob blinked as a splash of paint hit him. "Happy SASFD! Guess what! I think I figured out my special something!"

Squidward turned to the little poriforan. "What?!"

"It's my imaginaaaaation, isn't it, Squidward?" The particular rainbow he made this time was very pale—he'd grown exhausted from doing it over and over.

Squidward stared back. "Huh? That's not your special something!"

He frowned. "It's not?"

"No, it's NOT! Because you don't have one!" he said, nearly shaking with rage.

"What?! That can't be true….. say it's not true, Squidward. I don't believe you. Just tell me what it really is! PLEASE!"

"You wanna know? You reeeeallly wanna know?" he asked, a wild look in his eye. He reached for the first thing he could get his tentacle on, his clarinet.

"Yeah!"

"Then HERE!" Squidward forcibly struck SpongeBob with the clarinet, accidentally jamming it in one of his holes. When he pulled it out, SpongeBob's beating heart was stuck on the end of it. With each beat, blood squirted on both of them. "GAHH!!"

"Ohhh, I get it! My _heart_! I have a big heart!"

"N-no!" Pushing the end of the instrument back inside SpongeBob's pore, he scraped the organ back off inside.

"I'm confused," said SpongeBob, scratching his head.

Squidward trembled. _'Why must SpongeBob torture me so?!'_

"Hey, I just remembered, we never ate those waffles from this morning!" SpongeBob pulled them out from his underwear. "Nothing wrong with breakfast for dinner! Bahahahaha!"

_'Ugh, that's so gross!'_

"Where do you keep the butter, buddy?" he asked, looking through Squidward's dresser drawers.

_'And it top it all off, he's not even wearing pants!'_

"Oh, silly me! I can't eat dinner looking like _this_!" SpongeBob gestured downwards. For a moment Squidward thought SpongeBob might have finally realized how ridiculous he looked in just his underwear, until the sponge said: "I've got blood stains and paint all over me!"

"That is IT!" shouted Squidward. He picked up SpongeBob and tucked him under his arm as he made his way downstairs.

"Where are we going, Squidward?"

Squidward stopped at the laundry room. He tossed SpongeBob in the washing machine and slammed the top shut. "Here's a suggestion for your 'special something'…. SEE IF YOU'RE COLORFAST!!"

THE END.

* * *

_Well, that's it. It's finally over. Don't you just love sudden, random endings? I know I do._

_Also, I would to thank all who reviewed, it means a lot to me._


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